Large enthusiastic texts as in large texts about topics, you have common with the other person and enthusiastic about.

I am a person who prefers texts over calls. Maybe that might be the reason, the people I have in my circles are more into calls than texts.

But this happened with my online friends as well whose only mode of communication is via texts.

I used to have a friend who would do so but with the topics only he was interested in lol but I used to kinda act like I’m listening to him by asking small questions . He did try to complement my listening skills once. We used to chat for hours together. Sadly life moved on and he branched away from my friend circle (which is kinda non-existent rn because life ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯).

Or am I just too boring or loud? Is this a bad habit? Sometimes I can’t stop making walls of texts. (Oops here I go again)

Side note: Subscribe to c!doesanybodyelse@lemmy.world and help it grow. I wanted to make a post there but it was really dead. (It doesn’t have to be a lemmy.world instance.)

  • Libb@jlai.lu
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    28 days ago

    I am a person who prefers texts over calls.

    Are you talking about sending long texts on a phone?

    If that is so, even though I don’t know if you’re boring or not, I can assure that I would not read it. I never read/reply to a large text I receive on my phone (ok, maybe I would read it if it was from my spouse, but she can reach me much more efficiently using other means).

    I find the screen of any phone way too cramped, and the font way too small, for any kind of long form reading. Plus, the text layout will be shitty at best.

    Imvho, typing long texts on a tiny virtual keyboard is like trying to do brain surgery wearing mittens while riding a roller coaster. And reading it would be something like eating soup with a fork ;)

    Obviously, that’s just my personal opinion, anyone is more than welcome to disagree, but this may help explain, partly at least, the lack of reaction to your long texts? I mean, people simply do not bother reading wall of texts and/or they don’t feel like writing their own wall of text on such a poorly adapted keyboard/screen combo?

    As an experiment, you could try writing much shorter prose and see if you get more reactions from sending those?

    • IMALlama@lemmy.world
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      27 days ago

      Hard agree. There’s also the time component to it. If I’m on my phone I don’t want to have to spend much time reading, thinking, and the replying via text. I may hop onto my laptop to reply, but time is precious with younger kids which is why I first looked at the message on my phone…

    • zerozaku@lemmy.worldOP
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      27 days ago

      Guess it’s about which generation you are from. Old generation who grew with PCs tend to be on keyboards, while gen z tend to be on phones.

      The thing is I’m kinda stuck in between. Genz doesn’t have attention span to read texts while old gens hate to use mobile phones. I am someone who is tech savy from genz and I love using tech from both generations. I need to find my people.

      • Libb@jlai.lu
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        27 days ago

        Guess it’s about which generation you are from. Old generation who grew with PCs tend to be on keyboards, while gen z tend to be on phones.

        The thing is I’m kinda stuck in between. Genz doesn’t have attention span to read texts while old gens hate to use mobile phones. I am someone who is tech savy from genz and I love using tech from both generations. I need to find my people.

        I always have a hard time understanding that ‘gen’ thing. I mean, for me people are people. They’re not clones of one another that are expected to do/want/wear/like/dislike the same things because they were born around the same year.

        But maybe you’re 100% right, that’s a generational thing, well that would be so for everybody else but yourself since you somehow managed to escape that strict categorisation of behaviours and preferences by sitting between two gens. Suppose your assumption is correct, wouldn’t it still be much simpler to experiment writing shorter texts or write them on another medium that would be more suited to long form, to say hoping to find more ‘exceptions to the rule’, aka more people like yourself, to start having interesting discussions?

        Just sayin’ ;)

        • zerozaku@lemmy.worldOP
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          27 days ago

          Gen thing is pretty simple. People from that particular gen get used to doing things in a way that is famous in their gen. They see what the other people are doing in their age and copy them to feel more inclusive.

          PCs were famous and trendy in previous generation. Now it’s mobile phones. This is why we see gen z not being able to operate PC like their phones and previous gen not being able to do the vice versa. Pretty simple concept imo.

          Coming to second part of your message, yes I’m trying to be in on these long form media and this is why I started to post on Lemmy lot recently. But also I have feeling there are people like me who could match my enthusiasm who are worth finding and for the rest of the people I’ll try to send smaller texts as many have advised here 👍

  • Usernameblankface@lemmy.world
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    27 days ago

    So much text in one message comes across as monologuing. It makes sense that someone would only be interested if it involves something they’re very interested in or passionate about.

    The same amount of information broken up across several messages usually comes off better and invites a conversation. Especially if you wait for a response before going on with your subject.

    Edit, also be open to the conversation moving away from the subject you wanted to go on about. Constantly moving the conversation back to your topic so you can finish your thought doesn’t work out well

  • LilDumpy@lemmy.world
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    28 days ago

    I usually keep my texts short and with lots of spelling errors. And I almost always send them with a monotone in my head.

    On the flip side I usually think reading texts should be a short task. Unless you’re arriving arguing with someone I guess, but that should really be done in person.

  • WhatsHerBucket@lemmy.world
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    28 days ago

    Some people like it, some don’t. People think I’m weird that I text someone before calling, because I don’t want to call at a bad time.

    Also, if you post to a community that is pretty quiet, once you do, it’s no longer quiet ;)

    • zerozaku@lemmy.worldOP
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      27 days ago

      Also, if you post to a community that is pretty quiet, once you do, it’s no longer quiet ;)

      Haha true. But I was afraid that I wouldn’t get much replies over there especially since my post is about replies xD.

  • Ephera@lemmy.ml
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    27 days ago

    So, this is definitely not a diagnosis, as I obviously don’t know more about you than what’s in this post. But your post sounds quite a bit like the stereotypical autistic experience:

    • Being really enthusiastic about specific topics
    • Bonding with other folks on the autistic spectrum (that friend also very superficially sounds like they might be there)
    • Decidedly preferring texts over calls
    • Walls of text
    • Feeling like you don’t fit in with the rest of society

    Now comes the usual disclaimer: Autism is a spectrum. You might just have these few autistic traits as part of your personality and nothing else to do with it. But yeah, it could also be that you’ve got more such traits and that you’ll find it easier to bond with other autistic folks. You can check out some of the autism communities here on Lemmy to try to gauge, if your experience matches that of others in more ways. There’s also some questionnaires online, where you can get a rough score, which tells you the likelyhood of autism. For a real diagnosis, you’d need to talk to some doctors, though…

  • Free_Opinions@feddit.uk
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    27 days ago

    I feel like I’m the only one who shares things I’ve been up to recently and usually the responses I get back are passive at best. Then when I intentionally stop messaging them and waiting for someone else to say something first the group chat dies down for a week. I feel like it’s time to move on and leave these “friends” behind.

  • wirelesswire@lemmy.zip
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    27 days ago

    Hard to say without knowing the conversations or what the recipients are like.

    Personally, I try to keep texts to quick messages, as I’m not one for text conversations. If someone started throwing blocks of text at me, expecting me to keep up the conversation, I’d just call them. If they didn’t want to talk, then it probably wouldn’t be long before I just stopped reading the texts.

  • dohpaz42@lemmy.world
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    28 days ago

    I have the same problem. I usually end up editing out a bunch of text, yet still end up with a wall of text. I’m sure there’s a balance in there somewhere between enough information and too much information. I also try to remove unnecessary words and phrases to be more concise. If you figure it out, let the rest of us know. 😊

    • zerozaku@lemmy.worldOP
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      27 days ago

      Glad to know there’s someone like me. We are in this together my friend! We shall find something out.

  • themachine@lemmy.world
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    28 days ago

    I will be verbose if there is an actual keyboard under my fingers but unless I’m extremely invested in the topic and not also doing something else at that time I keep messages from my phone terse.

  • GrayBackgroundMusic@lemm.ee
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    27 days ago

    I used to, but people didn’t engage, so I stopped. Learned a few years ago to notice when someone doesn’t care (which is most of the time) and only engage when someone broached the topic.

  • nikaaa@lemmy.world
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    26 days ago

    Yeah I do that too. When I get really enthusiastic about something, I can talk about it for hours. So, it exists.

    I was told it is apparently an ADHD thing. Because some people I used to meet, did the same thing, about their favorite topic each. So, it’s an ADHD thing, apparently.

    But I’m glad you can bring up the mental energy to talk about a topic for a long time! That means you’re healthy :-) (imo)

    • zerozaku@lemmy.worldOP
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      26 days ago

      Finally someone who in this thread viewing it as a good thing and not as an some outcast behaviour lol.