This would be in the context of a romantic relationship/partnership. My overarching view of this is that I feel like in our times and culture those words have become very cheap. Seeing people treat each other like total garbage and try to put a band-aid on things by saying the magic words. Can love not be expressed by your actions, your nature, and your respect towards another person? I know when someone loves me, they don’t have to tell me also.
To be honest with you, I feel like this would be a silly question for me to ask myself because those 3 words come out very naturally for me, when it just feels right. It doesn’t have to be forced or manufactured; I don’t have to reach a certain amount of "I love you"s within a certain time frame—it comes out when the need to express it is just… there.
And obviously, do express it by your actions, your nature, and your respect, but I don’t see why these would be, in any way, mutually exclusive with letting out those 3 words whenever you feel it’s right.
To give an analogous situation, I don’t mind white people saying anti-racist slogans, and, in some cases, I might even encourage it, but they also should express their anti-racism by their actions, their nature, and their respect.
The point is that, while, “I love you,” can be fake, performative, and meaningless, so can a lot of things. But when you know that the sentiment being expressed is genuine, then that’s when it matters.
No forcing. No bullshit.
Just feelings.