I watched someone beat an opossum to death with a shovel as a child. They told me that’s just what you did with opossums and couldn’t understand why I was crying. It was just minding its own business and they decided they had to kill it for some reason. The sound and image is seared into my head and I’ll never get it out. I dunno if they ever got what was coming to them, but I hope they did.

I had a group of “”“friends”“” for slightly over a decade who were very abusive towards me. I was too lonely and desperate to walk away, and they knew that, so I endured the emotional abuse until they finally decided they were bored with me. I probably won’t ever fully heal from that. Last I heard the group had broken apart, but afaik that was all that happened.

At least I have better people in my life now, but the events of the latter mean I’m always on edge and just waiting for the other shoe to drop. I’m waiting for someone to pull the rug out from under me and show me they were just getting me attached so they could abuse me too.