My real ones, it would be fine. They’ve always backed me being active with gay rights issues going back to the eighties. They had no issues with my openly gay friends. They even let two of those friends live with us for a while. So, if it turned out they were gay the entire time, it might be a bit surprising that it took so long to come out to me, when I’m the extended family’s established “safe out” person; I’m the one the people in the family come to for that because I’ve been very open about support.
Hypothetically, if it weren’t my actual parents, it would really depend on the circumstances how I would show support. Someone coming out to you is a big deal. They’ll have individual needs and hopes from the decision, so navigating that without a history to pull from for predicting those needs and hopes can be thorny.
Like, some folks want the support to be super casual, like “Yeah? Cool, what’s for dinner?”. Others might need hugs and reassurance, or calm verbal recognition, or even celebration. It could be anything; there’s some folks that want/need it to be a little opposed or otherwise rocky because they can’t believe, in their hearts, that it’s possible for it to go smoothly. Without a little “drama”, they stay stressed. Mind you, I’m not really able to do real drama, though I can fake being upset it didn’t happen sooner as long as I can make it lighthearted and a little jokey.
Seriously, anyone reading this far, be the person that people come out to early on in their process of coming out. It’s such a beautiful thing to be part of.
My actual parents, or hypothetical parents?
My real ones, it would be fine. They’ve always backed me being active with gay rights issues going back to the eighties. They had no issues with my openly gay friends. They even let two of those friends live with us for a while. So, if it turned out they were gay the entire time, it might be a bit surprising that it took so long to come out to me, when I’m the extended family’s established “safe out” person; I’m the one the people in the family come to for that because I’ve been very open about support.
Hypothetically, if it weren’t my actual parents, it would really depend on the circumstances how I would show support. Someone coming out to you is a big deal. They’ll have individual needs and hopes from the decision, so navigating that without a history to pull from for predicting those needs and hopes can be thorny.
Like, some folks want the support to be super casual, like “Yeah? Cool, what’s for dinner?”. Others might need hugs and reassurance, or calm verbal recognition, or even celebration. It could be anything; there’s some folks that want/need it to be a little opposed or otherwise rocky because they can’t believe, in their hearts, that it’s possible for it to go smoothly. Without a little “drama”, they stay stressed. Mind you, I’m not really able to do real drama, though I can fake being upset it didn’t happen sooner as long as I can make it lighthearted and a little jokey.
Seriously, anyone reading this far, be the person that people come out to early on in their process of coming out. It’s such a beautiful thing to be part of.